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‘If’ Is An Apology Killer

October 7, 2016 By Sharon Leave a Comment

Yes, it’s about Donald Trump again. His latest comments about women are disgusting. Period. Looking through the lens of presentation skills, there is something here that everyone can learn from when it comes to making an apology, public or otherwise. I run across this with clients when I’m doing media training. It’s the “I don’t want to apologize but I’m supposed to so I’m going to ‘backdoor it'” strategy. People who adopt this strategy feel an apology is beneath them.

If you have chosen to take the high road then good for you! The next step is to apologize fully and completely. Be sincere, don’t blame or deflect onto someone else (Bill Clinton on the golf course) and don’t ever use the word ‘if’ as in “I apologize IF anyone was offended”. That’s not an apology. It doesn’t fix anything, it’s insincere, everyone knows you don’t mean it and that just makes your situation worse. It’s right up there with “I really love you but…”. When you hear that you know the next phrase out of the mouth of your loved one won’t be loving, right?

If you want to see an example of an apology that was well done, look up Michael McCain’s on YouTube after the listeria outbreak at Maple Leaf Foods. Watch his face carefully, watch where he swallows after telling Canadians how sorry he was for the loss of life and loss of trust. The apology was offered in words and through body language.

We communicate through words and body language. In fact, 55% of how we feel about communication is based on how someone looks (38% is based on how we sound and 7% on content).

When you are truly sorry there is no ‘if’ about it.

Filed Under: Observations

Watch & Learn

September 28, 2016 By Sharon Leave a Comment

I won’t go on and on with an analysis of Donald Trump’s debate performance — I’ll leave that to Wolf Blitzer and Co. I will say that his presentation skills in that debate showed what lack of preparation looks like. It’s not pretty, people.

Researchers say 93 percent of our emotional connection to information is based on body language. Trump ran the gamut: boredom, superiority, contempt (eye roll), and aggression. And he was always reaching for water and sniffing which can indicate anxiety, and/or discomfort with what is being said. He could have allergies but regardless, if we’re still talking about it then it took focus away from his message. He also has a habit of clenching his teeth together and grimacing after making a point which also looks aggressive.

All of these things can be fixed or managed. But that can only happen with preparation; dry runs; awareness; giving a ‘hoot’.

All presentations are emotional. All of them. In Trump’s case the emotional touch points were all negative. And that doesn’t even touch the content (Howard Stern? Rosie O’Donnell?).

Clients often tell me they don’t have time to practice. Really? How’s that workin’ for ya?

 

Filed Under: Observations

It’s the Start of a New Year!

September 15, 2016 By Sharon Leave a Comment

I don’t know about you but I’ve always thought of September and back to school as the real start of the new year. I know all that Holiday Hoopla has a big day for the New Year in December but September — when the air gets crisp and the leaves change and fall — that’s the real beginning. It was time for a new grade, new experiences and new, although seemingly irrelevant at the time, learning that I looked forward to. The annual “do-over” for kids navigating their school careers.

Now it’s a time to do things you’ve been putting off; get back from a slower summer pace; start taking those new project ideas forward. In my case it’s finally getting my new website up and running. It’s a ‘work in progress’ and always evolving. Perfect for the new year!

 

Filed Under: Observations

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